Everybody Gets Cake

Besides you and your team, who else knows about your goals? If you didn’t say, “My spouse and kids are closely tracking this important journey with me” then please keep reading.

Financial advisors work hard to separate work from home. We are trained to do this. There are books, podcasts, and workshops created to teach us how. But after 25 years in this business, I have learned that trying to separate work from home is one of the biggest mistakes we make. Why?

Life doesn’t work that way.

It’s unrealistic. The more we try to set boundaries between work and home, the more stressful it gets— and the more resentful our families can become.

What if instead you worked to include your spouse and kids in what you’re trying to accomplish for year-end? You’re trying to hit targets, achieve milestones, be profitable (or stay afloat), and hopefully bonus your team by year-end. It’s a lot to navigate alone. So don’t do it alone.

Call for a family meeting on Sunday. You, your spouse and kids are all invited. Explain to them that you want to share something important. Remind them that it’s November 1, there are eight weeks left until the end of the year, and you have some big goals you are trying to achieve. Without overwhelming them with industry jargon, tell them the three things you’re going for. Maybe it’s an income goal, maybe it’s a targeted number of new clients you’re trying to acquire, maybe it’s assets under management. Whatever your three things are, explain them in simple and measurable terms.

Then ask for their help.

Tell them you’re really going to need them over the next few months to help get you there. Explain that you want them to be your partners in your year-end push. You hope they’ll help you stay on track. You need their encouragement. You need them to know you might be working weird hours, or need more time behind a closed office door at home because you have a lot of clients you’re trying to help.

And tell them you can’t do it without them.

Then ask them to make you a chart. You’ll want to create a visual poster that shows everyone in the family where you are today, and how far you have to go in each of the three areas you are tracking towards. Let the kids manage this art project, and ask them to track your progress every week. Make it a Sunday thing (or whatever day works for your family). Attach the poster to your refrigerator or someplace that’s in plain site. Give them markers, crayons, glitter— whatever will make the project fun and exciting for them.

And let them know that when you reach your goals, they win too. When the chart/graph is all filled in, and it becomes clear to everyone that the achievements have been accomplished, let them know what they will earn. Come up with a prize to acknowledge their role in your project. Maybe it’s a movie night with extra candy. Maybe it’s a bonus in their allowance. Maybe it’s a new device/iPad/gadget that you’d normally not purchase for them— whatever it is, make it something that they know is special. Better yet, let them choose what the prize is going to be. (And do not lump this in with Christmas or Hanukkah gifts. Treat this separately from anything else.)

And then let the tracking and accountability begin! Every week, be prepared to report your progress to your new “home team.” Tell them what you’ve done to get you (and them) closer to reaching the goals.

This picture sums it up. My friend is a successful realtor. She is also the mom of these beautiful children. Danielle has had many victories this past year and she celebrates them all with her husband and these kids. As young as they are, they know that when mom’s listings are all under agreement, everybody gets cake!

Don’t have kids? Don’t have a spouse? Tell your parents about your goals. Share your goals with your siblings. Pick people who care about you, tell them what you’re going for, ask for help, and schedule a weekly check-in call. When this year comes to a close, be sure you also do something special to acknowledge their encouragement and love.